Patience

This is a really odd find: apparently bunnies invented Solitaire (or Patience if you prefer, whatever). I'm not kidding. If you go on Wikipedia you'll see that its origins are supposed to be either Scandinavian or German, but my sources tell me that the game is actually the work of the imagination of very, very, terribly and desperatly bored french bunnies. You know, french bunnies, the ones with the extra long and fancy mustaches.

According to the Great Bunny Archives of Gaule, many and many years ago there was not terribly much to do for young bunnies in European forests. They'd spend most of the day learning traditional bunny trades (being fluffy, baking, sculpting and masonry). At night there was nothing much for them to do, but since they had lamps they thought they could kill some time reading... Unfortunately full books were expensive back them. Luckly a very much not-memorable Bunny whose name I forget one day found a deck of cards near a trail, presumably lost by some traveller. There you have it, bunnies now had access to card games!

Of course, bunnies had no idea of how to play black jack, poker or anything worth your while. Soon they lost interest in that useless pile of cards since it had no use for them - or so they thought at the time. That same Bunny whose name I can't recall and who obviously also didn't have any friends (he didn't shower often, which is something french bunnies could get away with but this dude was also allergic do perfume... so you can see the issue there) was the only one who insisted in coming up with a use for the deck of cards. After all, he did have his own lamp and lots of spare time in the evenings. So after spending long nights staring at the cards, shuffling them, trying to come up with anything, the best that he could do was to come up with Patience. Really. He was defective.

This particular bunny didn't make any friends because of that game as it did not catch on at the time with the young crowd, but old secretary Bunnies mildly enjoyed it and started playing it regularly instead of doing their job.

That tradition was carried on over the years, specially since Microsoft saw the time wasting potential and made the game extra-popular with the soon-to-be-fired masses.

It's all true!

If you notice, there's a new feature added to this website: a seal of truthfulness. We are certifiably bringing the real, 100% true truth about bunnies and their much valued contribution to humanity. About time we got the recognition that we deserve!

Thank you for you support and blind faith!

Love,

The Bunnies Did It team.

New ancient manuscripts were uncovered today, their analysis will come soon!

From Pom-Pom to FRO

Today's topic is a bit of an obscure one: did you know that bunnies invented curly hair? It's true, too.

Thousands and thousands and thousands of thousands of years ago, back in Pangea, bunnies didn't have the same appearance as they do today. Their fur was long, curly and very gracious if I may add. All other animals who had fur weren't lucky enough to be blessed with lovely locks like the bunnies did, everyone else had straight fur or hair. Really straight, no waves in sight.

Obviously everyone envied the bunnies and harassed them, trying to find out what their secret was... But the poor fluffy bunnies had no answer, as they couldn't talk and all they would really worry about was when the next batch of carrot cake would be ready. Bunnies are always hungry, you see.

The other animals didn't ever stop the harassment, though. Day and night, they would bug the bunnies, kidnap them, roast them and generally torture the poor things... Bunnies were forced to learn how to run REALLY FREAKING FAST and to dig holes in the ground to hide during the day. They also eventually realized that the torment would never stop and chose to give away their beautiful locks... yes, bunnies also invented the flat iron hair straightener. It became tabu in bunny society to display curly fur, all curly bunnies where immediately punished and ostracized from their social groups.

But anyhow, with time other animal evolved to have curly hair, but only because the bunnies inspired them to do so. So now you can thank that cute little one eyed bunny at your local pet store for the gift of fros and curls.

While bunnies may not have invented ninjas, they did teach them precious techniques such as "disappearing", ultimate hopping and evil-eye expressions. To this day, ninjas are grateful to bunnies and revere them.

Bunny Baking

One of the main misconceptions out there regarding bunnies is that they eat carrots. WRONG. They only eat carrots in carrot cakes or muffins. This is true.

You can see where I'm going with this: bunnies invented carrot cakes. And they also invented frosting. It was hard too, as there's obviously a very limited supply of stand mixers in the wild, so bunnies have to make do with very artisanal methods and tools. It's a very complex process, where bunnies will take different roles: lumberjack bunnies will be responsible for gathering wood (or asking a beaver to help out), fire breathing bunnies will start the fire, little bunnies will shred the carrots, old granny bunnies will mix the batter. And ninja bunnies will steal honey from bees and milk cows without them noticing it. I'm not sure if any bunnies decorate the cakes, that aspect hasn't been well covered by scientific studies yet.

I know, so much trouble just to get carrot cakes when you could be getting chocolate cheesecake from your favorite bakery! But back in the day there were no bakeries, so that's the only way that they could get their fuzzy paws on some warm, delicious carrot cake.

Some bunnies still carry on with this traditional carrot cake baking to this day, but bummier bunnies can be seen on occasion lining up at Tim Hortons for those semi-edible items they insist to label as carrot muffins... What can you say? Some people (or bunnies) have no standards.

Bunnies invented plush, but that was a pretty obvious one.